“Why are you so obsessed with me????”
“Homemade spinach balls! Im such a good little chef lol #girlswhocook” (with picture of what I’m assuming are “spinach balls” attached)
“You can see my brown eyes ever since you said goodbye” (with selfie picture attached)
The above are Facebook statuses from a girl who I met once in high school who was two years younger than me. Now, five years later, I receive these status updates from her on a daily basis. I have talked to her maybe three times in my life and have had no interaction with her since I was a senior in high school. And yet, we are friends on Facebook, with the same Facebook standing I am in with some of my closest friends at Bucknell as well as my family. I suppose the real question then is: Why haven’t I unfriended her?
Before I give any sort of answer to that question, let me give a brief overview of my history on Facebook. I was relatively late to the game. Virtually all of my friends had an account and I felt pressured to join or become socially obsolete for the rest of my life. I was a sophomore in high school when I created a profile. It was during the next few months where I was engaged the most with Facebook. When I say engaged, I mean posting, commenting, and actually using the site as opposed to just being on it. After those first few months, however, I found myself logging on just to see what other people were posting. That was the main draw for me – seeing what was going on with other people in their lives (sounds a little creepy, I know). Especially after coming to college, seeing what my classmates from high school were up to was interesting and at times entertaining. I’m at the point now where I’ll post the occasional picture but I mostly go on to see what other people are posting.
Going back to my question from above, the truth is that I really don’t have an answer. I guess I kind of enjoy reading her statuses every once in a while when they show up on my mini feed. After all, they are pretty amusing. I find myself laughing out loud at the fact that she posts such ridiculous things on Facebook. I feel like she’s just trying to get attention (which I suppose is working if I’m taking 5 seconds out of my day to read her post). I feel that if I deleted her as a friend, I would have to go through everyone on Facebook that I’m not actually friends with and delete them too. That would surely leave me with under 100 friends. And that would be weirder than having her as a friend in the first place…
For those like myself who have a tough time deleting Facebook friends, luckily we can turn to Jimmy Kimmel. Apparently, last November 17th was the third annual “National Unfriend Day,” or “NUD” for short. What holiday is that you ask? It’s that wonderful time of year where you chuck your annoying Facebook friends. Last year, Kimmel developed a point system for letting people know who they should unfriend. For instance, posting a photo of a sunset is an 8-point deduction. As Kimmel so elegantly put it, “half of the people in the country are on Facebook, and many of those people have hundreds if not thousands of ‘friends’ – and I find this unacceptable. No one has thousands of friends.”
So, fellow BGS-ers, I urge you to mark your calendars for November 17th. Or, of course, you can just ax your fake friends at any time, just like I did now with the girl from above…